Pray for me. Please…

by shalinijena

The uncertainty of life is a strange thing… Sometimes you think you know what it and most times, you don’t think about it. Why? May be, you don’t want to. May be, you are too busy. May be, you haven’t lost anyone dear… May be, you have and to not think about it, becomes a choice…

It is rare feeling. It is not depressing, it is not sad… It comes somewhere from the heart, with the flashbacks reeling in the head and forms a choke in the throat. I know what this feeling is like. I get it when, someone I have been close to, someone, who I have known for years, is somewhere near or far, struggling in every breath.. I get this feeling then, that life is so uncertain.

The last time, I lost someone close, she was admitted in a cancer hospital and I saw her die right infront of my eyes, knowing, waiting and holding our breath for the minute when she will leave us, forever.

Today, I sit here, helpless, with the the choke now reaching the eyes, and there, far away, someone very special to me is lying in the same cancer hospital, oblivious to the surrounding, the people she loves, the people who love her. Even to think of it..

I cannot pray. It is not about patience. It is about the very nature of prayer…. The silence, the calm, the control, to let go… Maybe, it is about patience after all.

She is very special to me and I hope she knows how much I love her.

Please pray for her and for me…